NFL 2015

Hello and welcome back to I've Been Gone a Long Time. I appreciate you checking back for new posts every day since the last time we spoke. Today is when that relentless disappointment ends. Except that it will certainly be continuing, in all likelihood, since this post has required 0% of my time & efforts. I am sorry for your myriad of disappointments, and better luck tomorrow. 

P.S. The NOT GUILTY "deflategate" verdict has been in since the conclusion of January's AFC title game. The NFL has just publicly dragged this non-story out throughout the entire FUCKING offseason in an effort steal headlines and consequently remain at the forefront of every sports fan's brain, every day all year long. Mission accomplished; the NFL has perfected the art of stealing candy from babies. The babies are the media and media consumers. The most transparent conspiracy of my experienced adult life has finally concluded. The fix is in: the NFL rules the world. 

My educated picks for the 2015 NFL Season, now that Week 1 is complete: 

(GO BILLZ!!! My biased foreshadowing, post-Week 1, tells me that Buffalo's newly anointed starting QB Tyrod Taylor, former career backup of Joe Flacco, will be a monster. Which is exactly what I envisioned prior to seeing highlights of his first start. So I will be basing all predictions off this knowledge.) 

(Last year's crystal ball)

AFC EAST 

1. Patriots 

2. Bills- Wild Card

3. Dolfins

4. Jets 

AFC NORTH 
1. Ravens
2. Steelers- Wild Card
3. Bengals
4. Browns

AFC SOUTH
1. Colts
2. Texans
3. Titans
4. Jagz 

AFC WEST 
1. Chargers
2. Broncos 
3. Chiefs 
4. Raiders

NFC EAST
1. Eagles 
2. Cowboys
3. Giants
4. Redskins

NFC NORTH
1. Packers 
2. Lions- Wild Card
3. Vikings
4. Bears

NFC SOUTH
1. Saints
2. Falcons- Wild Card
3. Panthers
4. Bucs

NFC WEST 
1. Seahawks 
2. Cardinals
3. Rams
4. 49ers

PLAYOFFS
Wild Card: Bills over Chargers, Steelers over Ravens; Eagles over Lions, Saints over Falcons.
Divisional: Bills over Colts (unbiased), Patriots over Steelers; Packers over Eagles, Seahawks over Saints. 
Conference: Patriots over Bills; Seahawks over Packers. 
Super Bowl 50: Seahawks over Patriots. 

Peyton Manning retires, Tom Brady nearly retires. The best conference championship Sunday of all time. Please check back soon for another blog. Thank you for reading.